It started as a homage to Quentin Tarantino. But soon it got devolved. Maybe i should have chosen a less meaningful topic, a topic with less impact. (The waitress tip topic is awesome).
Anyways, but soon it had to bear a stamp and so it was. Everyone has his own way of doing things.
Warning: Some people may find the language offensive. This article is not meant for them.


http://mister-naman-ki-duniya.blogspot.com/2008/07/mr.html

Saare gunah maaf

Saare gunaah maaf (All mistakes pardoned)

This is again my philosophy made after deep though and meditation gifted to be by God himself after he had a heavy lunch and i was not allowing to go for his afternoon siesta. So, with total disregard to his usual process and with drowsiness he gave me the boon which i am calling as - Saare gunaah maaf.

Saare gunah maaf is a gift granted to certain individuals by which their current mistake is pardoned as if it never has happened. It is made clear by few examples below -

Steven Speilberg ke saare gunah maaf hain. It means that he can make endless bad movies (Indiana Jones 4,5,6,...., War of the worlds etc), we will not mind at all because in past he has made Schindler's list.

Another example would be
A.R. Rehman, he can make albums like Mangal pandey or the one for Jackie chan movie, it is all forgivable because he has given us swades and vande mataram.

Naseeruddin shah can act in any goddamn film like Kriish, or league of extra ordinary gentleman or he can make pathetic movies like yun hota toh kya hota but we have no right to get angry. His saare gunah are maaf because he has acted in the legendary serial - Ghalib, and movies like mirch masala, mandi and many others.

This rule is not limited to entertainment industry.
Foe e.g. in sports it applies to Sachin Tendulkar. He can get out at 0 for all the rest of his innings and all his mistakes will be pardoned.

In Sw. indistry, it applies to Steve Jobs. He can make any marketing disasters now and none would count as he has revolutionized apple once again.

In Politics it applies to Manmohan Singh. Because he played a very important role in 90s as the Finance minister, he can be as lazy as he wants.


There is a reverse rule as well. Saare sukarm nazarandaaz (All good deeds ignored)
It means that no matter how much good you do, it will be ignored because of your past.

But this boon was rejected to me by God because (1) His nap time was getting closer and (2) God himself was the example. I think i should have thought a better example.

Tum chalo ( I had to blog this)

Check out the video above: Its made by toi for their lead India show. I havent seen the show but the video song and lyrics is very good.
Music by: Shankaar, Ehsaan Loy
Sung by: Shankar Mahadevan
Lyrics: Gulzaar (who else)

Falak pakad ke utho, aur hawa pakad ke chalo, –2
Tum chalo, to hindustan chale –4

Lagao haath ke suraj subah nikala karein, ]
Hatheliyon bhare dhoop aur uchhala karein, ]–2
Ufaq pe paav rakho, aur chalo akad ke chalo,
Falak pakad ke utho, aur hawa pakad ke chalo, –2
Tum chalo, to hindustan chale –4

Meaning: falak (Sky), and Ufaq (Horizon)
Read the 3rd and 4th lines. Man! I can read them 100 times and still not get bored.
The lyrics are plagiarized from here: http://projectbee.wordpress.com/2008/01/05/tum-chalo-indias-new-anthem/
i am still looking for the person/organization who made this video.


And since TOI has paid for this video, it does not mean that i have started liking TOI. I just appreciate their this venture as i did when Airtel hired Rehman to make that awesome tune.

Some undefined laws

Are laws defined or observed? COnsider Newton's third law: Every action has a equal and opposite reaction. I claim that laws are discovered. On a sidenote- what will be the opposite reaction to the action of discovering a law.

This post is a highly philosophical post - i have discovered two laws which are still not in public domain. So before anyone else takes the credit, let me post them here before i file for a patent.

Law of minimum energy expulsion principle: Each action is governed by a principle that minimum amount of energy should be spent in executing that action.

Although, it is not as generic as Newton's laws but this law is frequently observed in the daily lives of lazy people. To support my law, common examples are tv remote, touch lamps, escalators etc. I have merely formalized this notion. it has been a long practice known with different names; In scientific jargon it is known as ergonomics, In management terminology it is called Just In Time technology.

The happiness law: Happiness can neither be created nor be destroyed. It can only be transferred from one person to another.

Like any laws, they can not be proved but only observed. This law has been studied by me rigorously. Common examples are :
1. It is frequently seen that humans derive pleasure on others' sorrow. This is exactly a consequence of above law. Other's person's sorrow leads to a decrease in his happiness which is gained by the viewer leading to his pleasure. From now on, please dont blame the viewer, he is just a pawn in the nature's grand plan.
2. Related to the above point, humans feel sad when they see others as happy. This again is reasoned by this law.

It is my belief that when Earth was created(whenever,big-bang, whatever!), a certain quantum of happiness was assigned to humans divided equally among them. How the first happiness transfer took place is again a chicken-egg problem.
As a corollary to the above assumption is that as humans grew in population, the level of happiness is distributed among that many and hence each individual is less happy than he was in past. This observation is also true today and hence forms a basis of my future laws/theories.

[Note: This post will be moved soon, in near future, so if you think that there are any flaws in my laws or you have found a counter-example, please let me know.]

Leap day

Damn! I am one day late.

Aman had a status message yesterday: savor the day!
And then he went on to write a blog post: http://yamuna-writings.blogspot.com/2008/02/29th-february.html

So i thought to pen some nice stories about it myself:

Last week my mom just joked with me and asked me to tell the name of my girlfriend. I also joked and replied that i will not tell you her name but her birthday is coming - its 29 feb. She laughed and said that then i cant marry her - she is still a minor!

Well thats the spirit of 29Feb - lucky enough to be the odd one and enjoy all the talk but unlucky enough for people to poke fun.

One thing that amazes me is that why do we have such a calendar system. How does it matter anyways. So if we have 365 days every year, ok then after some million years, we will have winter in june, summer in jan..so what. Global warming is doing worse than this. Whats wrong with the chinese calendar or the egyptian one. And who came with the idea of dividing the year in such an odd fashion, even the symmetry of alternating series is violated by july-aug, leave about feb.

The only reason that i can think at the top of my head is to make the life of amateur programmers hell.....ita a typical class XI computer science problem - Write a program to tell whether a year is leap year or not OR to write a program to convert a day to the date of year. Somehow the visionaries were able to guess that there will be computers in future, students will be forced to write stupid programs...lets screw them.

But here are some very interesting stories:

Tradition, Folklore and Superstition

A tradition was introduced many centuries ago to allow women to propose to men during a leap year. This privilege of proposing was restricted to leap day in some areas. Leap day was sometimes known as “Bachelors’ Day”. A man was expected to pay a penalty, such as a gown or money, if he refused a marriage offer from a woman.
The tradition’s origin stemmed from an old Irish tale referring to St Bridget striking a deal with St Patrick to allow women to propose to men every four years. This old custom was probably made to balance the traditional roles of men and women in a similar way to how the leap day balances the calendar.
It was also considered to be unlucky for someone to be born on a leap day in Scotland and for couples to marry on a leap year, including on a leap day, in Greece.

The above thing is taken from : http://laurenyoungfansite.wordpress.com/2008/02/29/today-is-leap-day-feb-29/

Another interesting post is : http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2008_02/013226.php
The post asks questions that when do people who are born on leap day celebrate their bday in a non-leap year.

One interesting answer posted there is :

My mother was a leap day baby and in off years always celebrated on Feb. 28. Her reasoning was it was bad enough to not celebrate on the right date so you may as well get the month right.

Joke

A mathematician (or you can also assume a cs theorist) was fed up with his work not getting anywhere and decides to do something else. He plans to become a fire-fighter and goes to a local fire station for an interview. The interviewer impressed by his intellectual record asks him to demonstrate some of his skills. He takes the mathematician outside through the back door and sets up a garbage bin on fire and asks him to extinguish the fire. The mathematician well versed with this practice pours water on the bin. After the fire is quelled, he says done. The interviewer says fine and now sees that smoke is still there. He asks the mathematician to get rid of smoke. Our mathematician thinks for some time and being a mathematician naturally has no idea on how to get rid of smoke. After some thinking, he again sets up a fire in the bin. The interviewer is perplexed now and asks the mathematician what he is doing, "why have you set up fire again in the bin"? The mathematician replies " I have reduced the problem to a state from where i can solve or atleast do something about it now. This should lead me to the correct solution"